He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
