How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
