stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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