So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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