i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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