I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
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