I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
tell me about the eggs
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