Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I lost the right to judge tonight
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
