Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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