Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I think a kid would responsible me up
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
