at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
