She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize