i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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