jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
