Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Randomize
