Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
