you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
