the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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