If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
