are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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