Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
they need to just BURY HIM!
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
