he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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