Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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