As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
