Me. At least after what I've been through.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
he shaved USA in his pubs
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
