I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
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