I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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