So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
