school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
she peed on how many people?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
