lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
