Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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