it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
