Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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