I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
