PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I just gargled with NyQuil
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize