before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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