There is no way he is gay with that hair.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize