I hope mine doesn't look like that
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
