He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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