Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
