Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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