you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I touched a dick in church today
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
