i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize