I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
