what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
