i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
it's great music for shaving your balls
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
