Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Boobs are out for the taking
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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