I just gift wrapped bread.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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