Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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