I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize