Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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