a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
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