I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
